Getting married is an amazing thing; however, if you get married for the wrong reasons, you might end up with the wrong spouse. Sooner or later, the marriage will be filled with too many challenges.
Here are three unhealthy reasons people often choose to get married:
1. "My parents are driving me crazy"
Believe it or not, some people get married simply because they are tired of living with their parents. They are frustrated by their parents controlling their every move, so they marry the next person they meet just to escape. Even when they see red flags, they think, “As long as this person gets me out of my parents’ house, I am good to go.”
Marriage is not like buying a plate of rice; it encompasses a massive part of your life. Getting it wrong can negatively affect your mental health and your future relationships. Furthermore, if a person cannot tolerate their parents, they will likely struggle to tolerate a spouse’s weaknesses once the “honeymoon phase” ends.
Psalm 133:1 says, “Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity!” No matter how difficult your parents may be, strive to dwell with them in unity until it is the appropriate time for you to enter into your own marriage.
2. Using Marriage as a "Cure" for Lust
I have always believed that if you are unable to deal with sexual temptation before marriage, it will likely follow you into the marriage. Rather than rushing to wed just to have a “safe” outlet for desire, focus on discipline and healing now. Ask the Holy Spirit for the grace to honor Him with your body while you are single.
Otherwise, unaddressed habits can lead to lust or even adultery within the marriage.
1 Corinthians 6:18 warns, “Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.” This is an area every Christian must work on because sexual sin creates soul ties and spiritual baggage. It is much better to address this before you say “I do.”
3. Fear of Societal Pressure
Never decide to get married just because of what society might say. Many people feel pressured as they enter their 30s, 40s, or 50s, fearing that people will think “something is wrong” with them if they are single. People will always talk; you should never let the opinions of others dictate a decision as major as marriage.
Ecclesiastes 10:10 says, “If the iron be blunt, and he do not whet the edge, then must he put to more strength; but wisdom is profitable to direct.” Let wisdom—not the fear of being judged—be your guide.
